February 2011
64 posts
“me: i’m a smart person! i just do stupid things sometimes.
kory:...”
– thanks kory. you’re a real pal.
if i could describe today in one word…it would be boggled. this morning, while playing basketball i actually got a rebound and was eagerly looking for someone to pass the ball to…i heard a boy yell “ashley!” and clap his hands in anticipation. i immediately gave a great overhead pass to him (when i say “great” i mean nba great. it was that good). i could hear...
January 2011
59 posts
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if you get the chance…watch “the king’s speech”. it’s amazing. colin firth and geoffrey rush are great together. also, watch for peter pettigrew from harry potter playing winston churchill. HILARIOUS. i don’t know if it was meant to be funny or not…
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“love is like racing across a frozen tundra on a snowmobile which flips over,...”
– matt groening
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day of mail
got my shoes, another tax return, and a victoria’s secret catalogue! happy day.
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“me: i thought for sure this episode had sex in it!
you: i feel robbed.
me:...”
– mine and holly’s conversation at 2:36 am
“Ammoned: to get beat so badly that you actually lose limbs (mostly arms).”
– kyle (on new verb names aka jimmered)
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if anyone would like to buy me this phone purse…i don’t know what i would/could do for you that would be morally acceptable…but you get it. it is literally a working phone purse!
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last night i had the opportunity to go to the museum of art on campus and tour the carl bloch exhibit (for freeeeeee). his paintings, besides his religious ones, were of the simple, humble people in everyday life that most individuals looked over. There was an amazing quote by Sigurd Muller-
(concerning Carl Bloch) “To whom nothing human was foreign because nothing was unimportant to him....
the great and terrible car debacle of 2011
soo…jana and i were going to cafe rio for a little dinner and guess what we saw? in the middle of the parking lot of a crowded cafe rio? with the lights on? a car! with a guy and girl going KERAZY at it in the driver’s seat. when we first passed the car i thought someone had left their lights on. lo and behold! the provo push in the parking lot! seriously guys? NO ONE wants to see...
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i just discovered that my astrology sign has changed. my mind is blown. at first i was resistant since i have been such a comfortable capricorn. from a goat to an archer…IT KNOWS ME SO WELL.
Sagittarius Traits
Positive Traits • Optimistic and freedom-loving • Jovial and good-humored • Honest and straightforward • Intellectual and philosophical Negative Traits • Blindly optimistic and...
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confession
i’ve turned into major debbie downer as of lates. headache numbers are increasing. so my water intake increases but then i have to go to the bathroom ALL THE TIME so that just makes me all the more blah blah blah. i wanna skip all my classes. i leave work early. i think i left early today because of the baby. usually babies make me so chipper! but lately they’ve just been depressing....
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Watchi’m not apologizing for posting numerous tosh. i’m just not gonna. where do i find me one of those radar contraptions? i wanna find out how fast i can run!
i am in some kind of fog today. it’s weirding me out!
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i’m at a crossroads…i left work so i could run and get some homework done before class and i would reward myself with panda express if i accomplished all of these goals. guess who left their wallet at home? so, i can’t run on the treadmills because i don’t have my id on me. the track is reserved for the track kids. i’m obviously not doing homework…and i...
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the following was taken from tosh.comedycentral.com/blog/
People on the Internet are freaking out about this photo of a mom tossing her baby across a crag. And yeah, it looks bad. But it also looks very BADASS.
Didn’t your mom ever push you on your bike and then let go before you were ready? And all of a sudden you were pedaling?
Sure, you were yelling at her and eventually you ran...
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i really don’t like dummies, puppets or life-like dolls. there are so many horror movies about killer dummies…but it made me think, if you get yourself killed by a doll you’re an idiot. a 6 year old could fend one off. just give it a swift kick and it’ll go flying. they don’t even have any muscles! and lemme give you another tip. when you first notice it might have...
i will never allow my baby to sleep in bed with me…i found that i fling things off my bed and onto the floor while sleeping. i had more to say but i forgot them all.
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being productive. laundry’s halfway done. cleaned my bathroom. about to take my time in eating my breakfast (what a luxury) while watching buffy the vampire slayer. nerdy saturday morning…
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today at an intersection there was a car that wasn’t going when the arrow was indicating that he could turn left. this isn’t rare. i see a lot of annoying people ignoring the honks because they’ve got the stares or are wrapped up in their phones. today, the man sitting at the wheel looked like he was slumped over. my verdict is that he was intently staring at his electronic...
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Watchto daniel tosh- i hope to find someone 2/3 as funny as you. hope.
to the moon- you’re beautiful tonight.
to the cute guy in my ward- i’m sorry you only ever see me in my sweatpants and bleary eyed at church every sunday. i’ll try to do better.
to the rocking horse in the sky- thank you for giving me a ride back to the apt. it is freaking COLD outside!
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dear girl,
please PLEASE stop eating your crunchy carrots so slowly during our boring class. i have no patience for the class, much less the added noise of you taking 5 bites from each of your 72 baby carrots. do you know how many bites that is?!! a lot. that’s how many. besides, baby carrots were raised to be something special. you’re merely mocking their existence with so many...
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“what you want natalie?
to drink and fight!”
– snl digital short
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saturday movie special
the 3 movies i watched yesterday…great day:)
“We’ve had nine classes together since Kindergarten…ten if you count Religion of Other Cultures, which you didn’t because you called it science fiction and refused to go.”
“Bosnia? They don’t have roads, but they have Facebook.”
“Curse you tiny toilet!”
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it's true
ever since high school i’ve wanted a john cusack standing outside my window with a stereo.
honestly. girls aren’t that complicated.
midnight ramblings
today was an interesting day. first. i’d like to just address with surety that blind people cannot play basketball. running is hard enough. don’t throw multiple people and a big ball into the mix. second. my day was increasingly brightened when robbie introduced me to the new hellogoodbye album. i haven’t been able to stop listening to it all afternoon/night. one of the happiest...
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hellogoodbye-finding something to do
dear...
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Watchyou’re better than all of us tosh. ALL OF US.
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life in provo is usually quiet and non-threatening…these are some of my favorite police beats…
Oct. 7 In Lot 48, A black Toyota was parked against a hill and the windows were fogged up. When the officer approached, the officer discovered a male and female in the car. After running the plates on the car, the officer noticed the owner of the car is banned from UVU’s campus for a sex...
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i’m listening to a lot of relient k as of late…and this has to be my favorite song of the moment. and incredibly applicable to my life. go find it and take a listen.
high of 75-relient k
We were talking together I said, “what’s up with this weather?” Don’t know whether or not How sad I just got Was of my own volition. Or if I’m just missing the sun And...
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more like the only lemming walking towards the cliff. if i had been alive in the 70s i would’ve rallied his innocence…though heroine skinny isn’t my niche.
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ever want a beard? here’s your quick fix:)
today was definitely one of those days where you just have to laugh…and/or punch somebody square in the back. 1) i dove for the vball and scraped…no BURNED my knees. it hurts like the dickens. and that one was my fault. 2) i almost fell into the toilet AGAIN. you’d think i’d remember that snowy days+slick shoes=not a lot of grip on the flusher mechanizm…i almost...
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NO ELDER CHRISTOFFERSON!! i don’t believe in resoluting with every new year…what about every new DAY?! waaaiiiit…i’m scratching out my exclamation. thanks for agreeing with me.
“the Lord is pleased with every effort”…that makes me feel better.
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BAHAHAHAAAA Story
i’m bored so i’m rereading old posts. i fell upon this story. to tell the truth i don’t even remember it…i miss my kids!!!!!
ps it’s in the second paragraph. first paragrah is a musing i’d apparently had.
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in a perfect world bigfoot would exist.
i’ve never watched harry and the hendersons til now…makes you wonder…
next up…jesus camp
